Breaking Through To Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a subject that I write about frequently. This is because in my life, in my experience, whenever I have been able to forgive someone, my life changed and improved in a dramatic and dynamic way.

Not so long ago, when speaking with my much-loved Aunt Merle, we were talking about my writing and teachings, and my efforts to use my life lessons for the benefit of others.

I commented to her that forgiveness was something I knew a great deal about and that I had become very good at it.

My aunt, who knew many of the challenges I had experienced in my life’s journey, got very quiet for a moment. Then she said with love and compassion in her voice, “Perhaps dear that is because you had so much that needed to be forgiven, happen in your life.”

That statement gave me pause. It is certainly true that my life has provided, possibly like yours, so many experiences and situations that were so awful that I rarely speak about them. In my mind, I just consider them my own personal horror stories. I frankly rarely think of them anymore. Still they are a part of my past, a past I have been able to be free of through my ability to forgive. Because forgiveness freed me.

By forgiving, I was able to let what was in the past, not be a factor in my present.

It is in light of this awareness that I write today to encourage you to forgive.

It’s not an easy journey, to get to a place where you forgive people. But, it is such a powerful place, because it frees you.
– Tyler Perry

Moreover, I encourage you to do it for what it will do for you and how it will impact your life.

It has always fascinated me that the most powerful and significant impact that forgiving had, was for me, rather than upon those I had forgiven. In fact it is not even necessary for those you forgive to know you have forgiven them. My forgiving freed me from carrying the pain. My forgiving permitted me to heal and move forward in my life.

Forgiveness is not always easy…
And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.
– Marianne Williamson

When I think back to the moment that I was able to fully and finally forgive, I feel such joy remembering the relief and release that I experienced, it still makes me smile.

Energetically, when I broke through to forgiveness there was a shift that felt like a thousand hurts and burdens shattering, like tempered glass, into refuse on the floor of my life, that could now be cleaned up and swept away.

Up until that moment I knew that I had only attempted to forgive, I even told myself that I had forgiven the myriad of betrayals and cruelties I was made to suffer. I persisted, and with each attempt I paved the way that helped me reach a point where I could finally and totally forgive, and with each attempt to forgive the burden got lighter.

In fact, I had been working on forgiving much of my life. It is as if I knew from an early age, even in the midst of being subjected to terrible acts and situations that I needed to find it in my heart to forgive. In fact, when I shared what was happening in my life and what I was being subjected to in terms of abuse with teachers, preachers and counselors; they advised me to return love and forgiveness. And I certainly tried.

It was only when I realized that an important part of forgiveness was acknowledging the wrongness of what I had been subjected to, that I could release the anger that I was carrying. Otherwise, in the words of my spiritual mentor it was “premature transcendence.” Honoring and admitting the reality of my anger was important.

Actually, it was only when my own spiritual journey took me to doing A Course on Miracles and I entered a phase of daily seed thoughts and affirmations on forgiveness, that I was ultimately able to forgive sufficiently and to be truly free.

Two seed thoughts that had a profound impact upon me, which were offered back to back, and which I spent days contemplating on I offer to you now. They are, “forgiveness is the key to happiness” and, “forgiveness offers everything I want.”

Doing, Not Trying

I had been doing spiritual work in A Course in Miracles when my business travel placed me in a situation where I felt compelled to visit my Mother. In my life, much of what I needed to forgive was centered on my relationship with my Mother. Some for what she did, but much for what she failed to do, for the ways she left me vulnerable and unprotected.

When I found myself face to face with her after many years of my avoiding being subjected to her cruelty, and the memories that being with her made inescapable, I thought I might as well put into practice what I had been learning.

I went into my visit with my mother determined to not fall victim to her abuse. I had decided that I would not give her the power to push my buttons. (Up until that time, her behavior stimulated a response in me that I did not like and was vastly different from my usual self.)

Certainly, it is true for most people that their Mother knows exactly what to say or do to push their buttons. That was very true for me. My Mother’s strongest weapon was her poison tongue. Her vitriolic attacks and demeaning insults were only a part of what I needed to forgive, but they were something that had continued even after her failure to protect me from others was no longer relevant, because as an adult I could now protect myself. These verbal attacks made it hard to be with her.

In addition, although I could never understand how or why she seemed to enjoy being mean and cruel, I knew that I needed to find a way to not be her victim.

When, in the course of our visit she said something that was both demeaning and cruel, something shifted in me. This was not new behavior for her and certainly not new in our troubled relationship. What was new was how I reacted to it. I looked at her and instead of being angry, I returned love. I maintained my center and did not react. In fact, I recall feeling a deep sadness.

Then, the most amazing thing happened. When I did not respond in kind by saying something mean and cruel back to her, she became angrier. She became frustrated as she lobbed insult after insult at me. As I stayed centered in myself and not reactive she became so angry and so frustrated that she ultimately insulted herself back for me. She did this by saying “I know what you are going to say is…” Ironically, what she said had never even crossed my mind.

What I then said, from my center, calmly was “I didn’t say that Mother, you did. Is that how you feel?”

In that moment, I was finally able to break through and forgive her. In that moment, I became free. I knew that for as long as we lived after that point I had the power to be who I was and not give her the power to control my behavior. In that moment, I discovered the amazing power of turning the other cheek.

In forgiving her, I was now free. That moment changed our entire relationship and that change remained until she passed from this life.

That does not mean that she was never mean again. Of course not. She was who she was. She did, over time come to appreciate the forgiveness I had given her, but the significant change was in me. The freedom and the release was mine, and that freedom and release allowed me to be in her company and be true to myself. To be who I had become in life.

There are in other articles I have written on forgiveness meditations and techniques that I have shared to assist you. I encourage you to consider them on your own quest to learn to forgive.

Forgiveness often contains many layers. Each time you forgive a wrong you peel away a layer and weaken the hold that the hurt has on you.

At its core, forgiveness is tied into love. The more you can love, the more you can forgive. The more you can forgive the more your compassion is stimulated as you understand better the factors that led to the circumstances you are striving to forgive. I encourage you and will continue to offer guidance and support on your quest to forgive.

When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future.
– Bernard Medtzer

Over the next 4 days I will post daily seed thoughts on forgiveness to support you through my Imagine 1 Minute social posts (please follow me on Facebook and Twitter.) Also, keep checking back, I am sure I will write again on the subject of forgiveness.

I invite you to experience the freedom that forgiveness gives. I encourage you to find it in your heart to forgive whatever horrors you may have been subjected to in your life. Your intention provides power.

Honestly own your anger and then let it all go with forgiveness.

Forgiveness Affirmations

To help you forgive here are some affirmations that you can use:

I Forgive You

I forgive myself for letting you harm me.

By forgiving you, I release you from our mutual past.

By forgiving you, I release me from the past.

By forgiving myself, I am now free of the past

I am sorry for all the time I reacted with anger.

I forgive myself for the times and ways I failed to love.

Now is a new moment, forgiveness enables me to open to new possibilities.

Forgiveness frees me to have the life that I desire.

What I receive by forgiving is freedom; freedom to free myself from old hurts, freedom to let go of the past. With forgiveness you are able to break free of old established patterns in relationships.

Most importantly, after you have forgiven, there is an opportunity for healing.

Forgiveness allows you to leave what has happened in the past where it truly belongs, in the past. This frees you from constantly needing to relive it or react to it.

It is even possible to develop a new bond and a way of being with the person you have forgiven that is much more satisfying and gratifying than what had preceded.

Forgiveness changes everything because forgiveness changes you.
– Genevieve Gerard

On the heels of forgiveness comes the chance to build something new and different. You are able to shed the anger that held you captive and limited, and give yourself the ability to move forward in your life. Ultimately, forgiveness permits both compassion and understanding to emerge. Ponder on this!

Namaste,

Genevieve

The Blessing of Love on all that you do!

P.S. I see that I have 20 other posts on forgiveness. Some offer tools and techniques that may be of help to you.

You may also be interested in my 5-star guided meditation called “How To Forgive Yourself: Let Go Of The Past and Release Your Pain And Sorrow.” Because when forgiving another, it often brings up the need to forgive yourself for not standing up for yourself or letting another harm you. This seems to be true whether you had any control over their actions or not.

Last updated 2-21-2018

Breaking Through To Forgiveness Read More »

Love is the Antidote

Genevieve Gerard

Love is the Antidote to Criticism and Judgment

Criticism and judgment may well be one of the most damaging ways you hurt the ones you love.

Sadly, it is one of the most common ways that couples destroy the love that should be the greatest blessing and joy in their lives.

It is a trap of inter-relationship, which has seeds in the psychological concept of projection, but more importantly in the dynamics of how people often “fall in love.” Unfortunately, our media manufactures unrealistic perceptions of what it means to love another.

PROJECTION

During that special magical time of falling in love, it is human nature to project all that is good and wonderful onto your beloved. Just as later in the relationship, it is human nature to project your own faults and failures onto your beloved.

Both of these experiences are illusions and neither of these has anything to do with love. Although, if you consider any of your failed relationships, beginning middle and end, you will most likely recognize this pattern.

Too truly love accepts the other as who they are, supporting and honoring them in their unique life journey, although it may well be different from yours.
– Genevieve Gerard

At the beginning of a relationship, you may have been drawn to your beloved, from the impulse of your Soul (whose nature is love) or your karma with the person. When you meet that someone, you may feel a connection that is special. This may even have to do with a bond of love that has been forged in eternity.

You may feel understood in a way you do not feel in most of your daily relationships. You could feel a sense of unity with the other, a coming together in a way that transcends the mundane. You know and acknowledge that this relationship is different. With your beloved, you are more alive, more real, more fully in touch with your full being than you normally are when you are alone.

You feel connected, content, and joyful. You may even feel more connected and in tune with your Soul, your higher self. Since most of us do not always feel connected, content and joyful, it is easy to assume that these feelings come from the other and the process of projection begins. You say to the other “you are wonderful.” The other says to you, “no, no, you are the one who is wonderful.” Feeling validated, appreciated and loved, you both feel wonderful.

This process of feeling wonderful, supported, validated, appreciated and even complete provides a hint to the aspects that compose a positive and successful relationship. Ponder on this!

This positive and supportive relationship can then grow and expand into the declaration of love for each other. This unconditional understanding and acceptance is what you long for and expect from love. This is what we have grown to expect of “falling in love.”

The two keys in this concept are unconditional and acceptance. To receive life-affirming love and acceptance are powerful and life-affirming. It gives you the impetus to be the best that we can be. In addition, when you are willing and able to give your beloved unconditional love and acceptance that brings you together, you move forward in life to have the true strength and joy that comes from a loving union.

Thankfully, you can use this illusory period of projection to truly let love blossom and mature into true love. Armed with the blessing and the strength of love you are then able to move forth in life to be and become all that you can be, knowing and trusting in the benevolence of that love.

CRITICISM and JUDGMENT

Sadly, for many loving unconditionally is too much. Forgiving the little hurts and the real or imagined slights that could sustain the love is just too hard. Unfortunately, what follows next in the pattern of relationships demonstrates why learning to forgive is such an essential part of love.

The unforgiven slights and hurts build up and become criticisms and judgments. No longer do you say to your beloved, “you are wonderful and I love you.” Rather, the message becomes, “you have failed,” “you are wrong.” “You are less than you could be, ought to be or should be.”

No longer does the confidence and faith in yourself that came from being loved and understood give you the strength and courage to go forth in the world to be all that you can be. No longer do you feel strengthened and supported. Sadly, what has disguised itself as love now has become harmful, limiting and demeaning.

Having the one who says that they love you, or who has vowed to love you, be critical and judgmental can be very confusing. Often this transition starts a pattern of criticism and judgment that ultimately destroys the love that was once created. It may take a lifetime to destroy because love is a powerful positive force.

Receiving, in return for your love, criticism, and judgment, from the one you love and from whom you once received love, is devastating. It creates pain and often undermines your self-confidence. You cannot understand how you can love someone and receive back the toxic criticism and judgment where you once received love and acceptance.

The harm of criticism and judgment is immediate. You may feel betrayed by life and love itself. The ability to trust in your love is in some way fatally damaged. The lack of trust and the betrayal it brings may take years to destroy the relationship because the criticism and judgment is often interwoven with loving and positive messages.

It is important to realize a truth I first read in the seed thoughts of “A Course on Miracles.“

judgment is the opposite of love

Judgment fails the life direction of harmlessness because I can imagine little that you can do to another that is more harmful than judgment. It undermines confidence; it destroys the celebration and self-assurance that could come with every success by holding it up to an impossible and imaginary standard of perfectionism. It is a toxic poison in relationships, especially and most importantly in relationships that are presented as loving relationships.

Unfortunately, judgment and criticism are all too often the results of your own feelings of failure. The very projection that was so active at the beginning of the relationship, of declaring the beloved to be so wonderful, is now in full manifestation of a constant process of faultfinding or blame.

Also sadly, on some level you probably realize that the process of projecting feelings of failure on your beloved is damaging. This increases your feelings of failure. When you are actually trying to be loving and supportive, being the critic results in more self-criticism and self-loathing. On a very deep level, you know you are failing to love and are hurting the one that you love. This failure to demonstrate love only escalates this cycle of judgment and criticism. It is easier to blame the person you love than to take stock of yourself and face yourself with truth.

Recognition of how you have failed to love, by being critical and judgmental, is important. Asking for forgiveness, and/or repenting are all important parts of forgiving.

Committing to break the behavior habit of criticism and judgment is significant. Watching and evaluating what you say, with the consideration of harmlessness and right speech in future communication with the beloved, can help rebuild and re-establish the environment in which love can thrive.

THE FORGIVENESS PROCESS

Learning to forgive is of course the answer. Forgiving yourself, not only for your failure to love unconditionally but also for all of the little ways you have failed and fallen short of your own self-critical expectations of perfection or success is important. This is a very important step in stopping the toxic treadmill of criticizing others.

Self-forgiveness can open the door to loving yourself because loving yourself is essential to you truly loving another. Forgiveness is a way to heal your past. It can wipe the slate clean, and open before you all of the possibility, hope and promise that you have ever dreamed of. Self-forgiveness in your failure to love, and asking for forgiveness from your beloved, are key parts of rebuilding and reestablishing the promise of love you gave.

To forgive yourself you must open yourself to your Soul, which both now and always has loved you unconditionally. You do this by calling upon your Soul to help you with this awesome task.

Your Soul knows and understands all of the reasons you have failed to love. It knows what challenges resulted not only in your failures to love but also in all your failures in life. When you sincerely call upon its help, it can and will reveal to you clarity about your life and your choices that may be painful to observe. This often strips you bare of all of the excuses and justifications you have used.

Learn to forgive with my, 4.8/5.0-star reviewed,
“How To Forgive Yourself” Guided Meditation.
Available immediately as a MP3 download on
iTunes, Amazon or here on my website for only $8.88 US.

As you invite the higher vibratory energy of your Soul Light in, it moves through your consciousness and you are, by its revelation, able to know forgiveness and the higher nature of real love. Most important with insights from your Soul comes a clarity that shatters the behaviors of the past and opens up an unformed future that now lays before you, free from what has been.

The tears and horror of what you have done may need to be released, but the grace and peace of truly forgiving yourself are so powerful that you can now look at your old behavior patterns with compassion. You can emerge from this a new and much better person.

You realize that when you have forgiven yourself, you can now honestly ask for the forgiveness of the person you have failed to love unconditionally. You can stop criticizing or judging. Instead, you can give true love from the depths of your body and Soul. You can give unconditional love!

This journey to the Soul, to the self and too forgiving yourself may well be the most powerful and transforming decision you have ever made. In the act of self-forgiveness, you can silence the voice of self-criticism and judgment that you projected on your beloved and miraculously change your behavior.

Without forgiveness and love, you will live with resentment, bitterness, malice, and strife which result in more pain. You can never love without forgiving. Forgiveness deepens your ability to love and frees you from pain.
― Kemi Sogunle

The final step in this forgiveness process and returning love to your life is to ask for the forgiveness of your beloved. Forgiving the hurts and slights, that happened along life’s way is important. It is an essential ingredient in any loving relationship. Without it, love cannot be sustained and thrive. Amazingly, forgiveness is so powerful that it can restore the blessing of love in a relationship. It can renew both your hope and your joy.

It is never too late. Forgiveness and love both live in the “Now” and so can be restored in the moment. Such is the unlimited power of forgiveness, the promise of living in the presence and the miracle of love.

When you ask for forgiveness, let the truth that the Soul’s Light reveals guide you. Forgiveness comes from Love and Grace. It is a gift of your Soul.

As Church traditions teach, there is a powerful impact of contrition and making amends. These do much to solidify and manifest the changes in your life that self-forgiveness desires. In forgiving yourself, you seek the capacity to transform both yourself and your life in a dynamic and substantial way. This is available to you. You are not limited by your past.

Forgiveness is the handmaiden of Love. By forgiving, you express and manifest Love. Love is more than a romantic excursion but a momentous guiding force in your life. Learning to Love and learning to forgive are supporting pillars of a spiritual life. Through these two important acts, you can increase your peace of mind, find satisfaction and lasting happiness. These are the keys to a life of joy and serenity.

Namaste,

Genevieve

The Blessing of Love on all that you do!

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About the author:
Genevieve Gerard teaches Transformational Consciousness – from first awakening to enlightened Soul awareness. She helps you experience the joy that results from the spontaneous “touch of your soul.”

The Last Step in Forgiveness

Genevieve Gerard

The Last Step in Forgiveness

This morning in my meditation as I was considering the concept of forgiveness I was granted a new understanding of how forgiveness works. Something I realized is the last step in forgiveness.

Forgiveness has long been a pondering point in my meditations. It is a subject on which I have often written. It is a spiritual work that my life experiences required for me to become free of assaults and indignities that I suffered in my childhood, and sorrows and betrayals in my adult life.

Therefore, to have a new revelation about how the subtle and energetic workings of forgiveness impact life is very exciting for me.

To understand the mechanics of forgiveness in this new light expands the power of what is already one of the most powerful tools of transformation. Forgiveness is a liberation that frees pain and sorrow and allows it to heal. It unravels the chains of anger so that you no longer have to carry the past around and trip over it.

I shall try to share this new understanding with you because I know it is important. The way that this disclosure that I am calling the last step in forgiveness released the energy around a wrong committed by another released a whole new layer of forgiveness that I had never seen before. If you have read any of my previous writings on forgiveness, you know that I teach that the best reason to forgive another is to free yourself from the burden of the past. This then opens you to the unlimited possibilities of an unformed and now unfettered future that is just coming into manifestation.

As such, I have advised you to forgive another, not so much for them, but for you, for it is your life that is freed from the past, and it is your burden of anger and betrayal that is laid down. All of this is imparted in my prior writings and can be explored in detail in the links to related posts at the conclusion of this blog.

Let me start by saying that Forgiveness is profound spiritual work, it, however, is also one of the most life-transforming tools you can use for your personal growth and development.

When we have opened ourselves to give forgiveness or to accept forgiveness we have opened ourselves to touch the Divine.”
– Genevieve Gerard

Today’s revelation and understanding go beyond anything I have ever written about the importance of forgiveness. It is not only something I have never talked about before, but it is also a new understanding of the dynamics and workings of forgiveness on an energetic level that makes the act of forgiveness much more powerful than I have ever realized before.

It works on an alchemical energetic level. It works with the powerful principle that energy follows thought and it relies on the truths expounded in the teachings in the field of Neuro-Linguistics. It requires a new layer in the process of forgiveness that has the power to transform the one you are forgiving.

It speaks to an age-old question about forgiving that has always been intertwined with the concept of forgetting. Yes, it has long been argued I can forgive, but I cannot forget what the other has done. In addition, since what has been done in the past cannot be changed, that has had to do.

We all know that it can be a challenge to forgive, so to forget throws it over the top. It is just too much to consider for most people. What we are forgiving in another are usually the most painful things they have done. Just to forgive something seems to be enough.

Indeed, on many levels it is too much for most people. Nevertheless, the insight that I received this morning in my meditation and indeed the whole purpose of this article is to take forgiveness to a entirely different higher level. A level that can bring about real and lasting change in the life of both the one who is forgiving and the one who needs to be forgiven.

Thoughts, as I have often written have great power. It is a universal principle that energy follows thought. Thoughts, in fact mold the world around us in creating our experiences and our reality. They influence the very fabric of matter itself in the world around us. This is part of the new knowledge that began when the world of physics discovered in recent times the workings of subtle energies that are being explored by the newer field of Noetic Studies. The secrets becoming known are beginning to confirm what have long been the teachings of the occult and have been passed down throughout time as the Ageless Wisdom.

This ageless truth is also the basis for the teachings of many past and present thought leaders and motivational speakers. It is to them that I reach today for the words of how to explain this new layer of forgiveness, this new revelation about how forgiveness works.

My Insight on How To Forgive

We all hold in our mind thought forms about one another, just as we hold thought forms or beliefs about ourselves. These thought forms, these beliefs that we hold onto about ourselves often are a focus of our personal work and often must be removed consciously when it is realized that they are “limiting beliefs.” As any practitioner of N.L.P. can tell you and most counselors, life coaches and therapists would confirm, releasing a limiting belief about yourself or making a conscious decision to revise that belief to bring about a desired change when you can affirm “that was true of me then, but now I am …” is a life changing transformational tool.

What I realized to be true that relates to forgiveness is that these beliefs, these limiting beliefs we have of one another create a reality manifested by our thought forms, expectations and the power of the energy we give to it. To release the negative and/or limited thought form you hold in your mind about the other person gives the act of forgiveness the life transforming power of empowering them to change. Ponder on this.

If we can, when we forgive another, also release the thought forms we have created in our minds about them, there is an energetic discharge that frees the person you are forgiving and empowers them to go on in their life and become the person they are striving to become.

To forgive, without this dynamic extra step in the forgiveness process, dare I say the last step in forgiveness, adds to both the probability and possibility that they will again live up to our expectations (and energetic thought forms) and continue to do exactly what they have always done before that needed forgiveness.

Certainly, the best predictor of future behavior has been past behavior. That very expectation, that limiting belief held by both you and the one you are forgiving creates a huge obstacle to their change. Likewise, when you forgive down to the level of shattering the limiting belief you are holding in your mind about the one you are forgiving, you open the door to real and lasting change for them to take full advantage (and responsibility) of the possibilities and potential of the unwritten emerging future with a real freedom that simple forgiveness without this step does not grant.

So, when you forgive, although you may never forget what was done, if you can within your own mind, with the love of your heart, release the limiting belief you have held of them and hold the image in your mind of how they can be and who they can be, freed from the hurtful and painful behavior they have exhibited in the past, you are by your forgiveness, setting them free.

They can release all of the failures and foibles so that they can be, all that your love desires them to be and all that they desire to be for themselves. Then your act of forgiveness has the power and potential to expand into an act of transformation that will make you, and the one you are forgiving and who has needed forgiveness, much happier.

As I was pondering this, I saw the image of the person I was forgiving shatter into millions of shards that exploded and released an amazing rush of energy.

Releasing a Limiting Belief

To release a limiting belief, whether about yourself or another, requires being aware of your mind chatter and what you are thinking. Then you need to change the thought “change your mind” and thereby “change your life.” This is done by editing your negative or limiting thoughts and replacing them with positive, transformational or healing thoughts.

As soon as you catch your thought defining someone (including yourself) with an “am” or “is” statement such as “I am . . .”, “He or she is . . .”, immediately revise the negative or limiting thought with a reframed new positive, limitless thought, now free of the negative limiting belief.

This takes vigilance and consistency. Energy follows thought, that is both the rule and the underlying principle but conflicting thoughts undermine the efficiency of the desired change especially when it requires changing ingrained patterns of behavior. Ponder on this rule.

Know that, with this process transformation and change do occur. It begins with the alteration of a single thought, which works its way energetically into manifested substance, until one day you notice that the limiting thought or belief is no longer in your thoughts. Interestingly, it is often only vaguely in your memory and at that point, you truly know that you have exercised your role as co-creator of your life.

I encourage you to experience this last step in forgiveness, releasing the negative thought forms you have held in your mind about the other and watch how their lives may transform.

Know that this new aspect of forgiveness can bring about real healing in relationships when forgiveness is being asked and being granted.

Remember the past is finished. It has no power over you or over them when with your forgiveness you also free them from your thoughts that have held them in that past. The future is now revealed, as the unfettered and unlimited possibility, to evolve as the fulfillment of all of your dreams.

Namaste,

Genevieve

The Blessing of Love on All That You Do!

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The Gift of Forgiveness

Genevieve Gerard

The Gift of Forgiveness for Father’s Day

As Father’s Day arrives our thoughts turn to what gifts we can give. I suggest forgiveness.

Many of you may have had wonderful Fathers, who you love deeply, and who have loved you deeply. But no matter how wonderful they are, or were if they are no longer with you, odds are that there is in the life experiences you shared some slight, real or imagined, event, accidental or careless act that will benefit from being forgiven.

Such is the nature of life. We miscommunicate, misunderstand, and fall short of meeting one another needs. It is usually not intentional. It may stem from busyness or a clash of needs at a particular moment of time. It may be forgotten or harbored with justification and resentments.

Without forgiveness life is governed by…
an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation.
– Roberto Assagioli

Whatever the situation or circumstance, I suggest Father’s Day as an opportunity to forgive it. Forgiveness is a gift you can give that requires no money. It is a gift that by giving to another, you also give to yourself.

You might upon reading these words say there is nothing to forgive. Or if as you read this you may begin to make justifications or excuses like “he did the best that he could” or “he didn’t mean to hurt me.” Or when remembering and realizing the hurt you still think that is too small or too petty to forgive.

All of that may be true, but the power of forgiveness is so broad and vast that I would recommend strongly to just forgive the hurt anyway. Forgiveness is a tool you can wield to bring you into the present moment, into the NOW. Forgiveness frees you from the past, and especially in relationships, opens you up to both give and receive love at a whole new level.

Forgiveness heals relationships of pain and hurt of which you may only be vaguely aware. The wonderful thing is it isn’t really hard to forgive once you have chosen to do so. Choosing to forgive can be the hard step and resisting forgiving harder still. Yet there is nothing I could suggest to you as families gather together and celebrate Father’s Day that could empower you more, bless you more or transform your life more than to use this opportunity to forgive.

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.
– Robert Muller

Forgiveness ends all the illusions of any conflict you may have had with your Father throughout your life. It does not matter if the slights are real or imagined. It does not matter if he even knows you were hurt or injured. He need never know you harbor anger or resentment. Forgiveness wipes all slates clean, opening your relationship to a new depth and a new understanding.

To experience a transforming guided awareness meditation that unites families, download my 12-minute meditation: Heart of the Family.

One great advantage of taking this opportunity to forgive is that by forgiving you are bringing your relationship with your Father into present time which then enables you to relate to one another from the mutual understanding of two adults.

This will be incredibly freeing and empowering. This shift in perspective may well enable the two of you to express things that have never been said before. After choosing to forgive their Father, I have had clients frequently report that the entire relationship with their Father changed, although they may have never said a single word to their Father about forgiving them or even feeling that they had a need to forgive them.

The task of forgiveness can be spiritual work. It is so very powerful and expresses in so many deep and subtle levels that it provides a fast track to transformation. As it transports you from the past into the present it also corrects errors of perception bringing you from the unreal to the real.

Ultimately an act of forgiveness is an act of love. By giving forth the love that created you to the one who sparked your formation with an act and expression of their love you are activating deep magic in your life.

Forgiveness is also an act that can release profound healing. It is a way of demonstrating love and by so doing it automatically triggers grace and compassion. It can be one of the most powerful things you can do to transform your life and enhance your success and ultimately your happiness and joy.

Forgiving one’s Father can also be interwoven with issues of success because archetypically a Father’s love is less unconditional. Most children grow up feeling that they must earn a Father’s love and most feel the best way to do that is to be successful.

Likewise, for many the primary issues for which they need to forgive their Fathers are tied into a perception of unavailability or lack of attention because of the Father’s involvement with work and career. Therefore, the act of forgiving your Father can have far-reaching implications in your life.

One very effective forgiveness technique is Hoʻoponopono [ho-o-pono-pono] (an ancient Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness.)

The Key Phrases That You Can Repeat Are:

Please forgive me
Thank you
I love you
I forgive you
I forgive myself

I wrote in more detail about this in my Holiday Forgiveness and Gratitude post.

Ultimately, forgiveness is the foundation to bring greater peace and serenity into your life. It is a cornerstone of all of the great spiritual teachings for thousands of years. But the most amazing part of forgiveness is the way that forgiving improves your life. What you intend as a gift and a blessing for the person you are forgiving ends up being a blessing and a gift in your life that impacts your life in ways that can be unimagined and empowering as you are freed and unburdened from wounds you may have forgotten and not even have realized you were still carrying.

The link between Love and Forgiveness is woven into the fabric of your life and whatever effort thought or energy it takes is returned to you with more benefits than you can measure as it ripples through your life releasing and freeing you from often unseen or unrecognized disruptions on your path as you journey through life.

So this Father’s Day just say I Forgive You and enjoy the gift of forgiveness in your life.

Namaste,

Genevieve

The Blessing of Love on All that you Do!

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Last updated 6-21-2020

As the Year Turns

Genevieve Gerard

As the Year Turns

New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day are fertile times for reflecting upon your life.

As you do so it seems that there are several powerful ways that you can welcome in 2021 and empower yourself to manifest in the New Year more success, more joy, and ultimately greater happiness.

Perhaps the most powerful and important thing you can do as this passage of time is marked is to bring your consciousness and awareness into the present time, into NOW. This shift to the NOW involves several simple understandings of what is always true but may not be the focus of your thoughts and attention.

Therefore, I encourage you to consider deeply the fact that the past is over!

Seize the Opportunity That Today Offers You

With the strike of the midnight hour you are freed from last year. You are now invited to the unlimited possibility and potential of a new year. The future, brimming with promise is before you and you hold within the creative power of your mind and your life the ability to bring to fruition all of your dreams, all of your desires, your reason for living.

To enhance and best activate this powerful moment where you rest on the threshold of a new year which can be a whole new life, I encourage you to take a few minutes of time to forgive yourself. Since the past is over, nothing is gained by carrying the past forward in the no-win dynamic of self-blame and recrimination. So I urge you to use this transition from the past into the future to really forgive yourself.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift:
That’s why they call it the present.
– Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962)

Seize the opportunity that today offers you to invoke, affirm and dream. Your destiny is calling to you. Open your heart mind and Soul, to hear that call. As you release the past to its proper role in your life and forgive yourself, you can further free yourself to be fully open to receive what tomorrow has to offer by forgiving any who have ever caused you harm, intentionally or unintentionally.

When you do this you are like a babe newly born to a new life like the New Year’s images who usher the old man of the past out the door.

The icing on the cake of celebration of the becoming of the New Year is to express gratitude for all that you have ever experienced knowing and rejoicing that it prepared you for the amazing future that is now ready to unfold for you, right here, right now.

New Year Affirmations

As the New Year emerges into being here are some positive affirmations you can use to empower your life.

I open my eyes to see the new opportunities that are unfolding for me.

I open my mind to inspiring and enlightening awareness of what I can do to manifest my dreams.

I open my heart to attract to me those who can help me and those I can truly aid.

Remember this New Year has never been before! Move into it with joy and celebration, openness, and invitation to create the reality you invoke as the year turns.

Namaste and Happy New Year,

Genevieve Gerard

The Blessing of Love on All That You Do!

P.S. QUICK FACT: This post has been viewed 16,178 times. Please share it with friends and then check out our other related posts below and in the “Hot Topics” sidebar.